Know Your “Why”
There’s a lot of advice out there in the homeschooling world, from both new homeschoolers, Instagram influencers, and veteran parents—even from Miss Mason herself. Plus there’s the educators that came before her.
My youngest son, eager for his first day of the letter “A” in his preschool.
Today, we also have access to psychologists, psychiatrists, occupational therapists, educational therapists, counselors, and more. And let us praise God for it. We have resources at our fingertips that previous generations only dreamed of. We have new keys to unlocking our children’s minds and bodies.
Sometimes all of this advice can leave us paralyzed, though, can’t it? It can leave us anxious, distracted, and guilty if we’re not doing what influencers we ought or if we’re doing what veterans think we ought not.
Charlotte Mason says to not start formal school, for example, with students until they are six. That is a rule that can be applied woodenly in a way that says, absolutely no instruction for a child under six, ever. No books, no talking about letters, no craft projects, no curriculum. Of course, this is not exactly what Miss Mason meant. She wanted to make sure that we protect a child’s growing-up years and give them ample time to wander and wonder in God’s creation and in relationship with family and friends.
I intended to follow Charlotte Mason’s wisdom on the younger years perfectly. And then I met my first-born. By the time he was three or four, we needed tae kwon do, library reading times, weekly Bible study, and multiple stations around the house: painting, puzzles, trains, books, dress-up. He would spend a few minutes at each and then bounce to the next once. We had weekly therapeutic and medical appointments. We made cookies every Friday afternoon. I felt like he was a bucket with no bottom that I could keep filling with activities and enrichment.
“If any of you lacks wisdom, let him ask God, who gives generously to all without reproach, and it will be given him.”
When a mentor suggested we start a 3K, I was thrilled. We finally found some structure to add to our day before we headed to our weekly activities. That preschool was a life-saver, for him and for me. I felt guilty, though, that I was defying Charlotte Mason.
Now he’s 12 and I’m doing preschool with my third, a four-year-old. Why? My third child’s life is already filled with enrichment. He lives in a busy house with the demands of homeschooling a middle schooler and elementary schooler. He tags along to swim practices where he can play in a splash pad, has all the toys passed down that he can rotate through, has two people to play games with, and can wrestle a dog my older children didn’t have at this age. He hikes and camps with us, visits National Parks, and can do art projects any day in almost any medium. He listens along to our Morning Times and is already trying to memorize poetry and scripture alongside us.
I don’t need to do preschool with him in the same way that I needed to do it with my oldest. What my youngest needs, though, is my undivided attention. For fifteen minutes a day, I want him to know that I care about him enough to read a picture book, a Bible story, paint a tree, and make glitter-glue letters. I am still making the decision to do preschool, but for a very different reason.
Know why are either listening to an influencer’s advice or not listening to a veteran’s advice, or vice versa. (Caveat emptor: I would be much slower to dismiss a veteran’s advice than a newbie homeschooler’s.) Worksheets are a no-no, someone tells you, but maybe you found a book of preprinted copywork for your child and you rip out a sheet a day to ease your load.
This is why Cottage Press exists—our curriculum is trying to organize the elements of language arts instruction is a way that helps you, not obligates you or causes you guilt.
Read Charlotte Mason’s volumes. Read Cottage Press’s description of the Progym. And then, “mix with brains,” as Miss Mason says. Make your decision and know why you are doing it.
Ultimately, let us turn continually to our helper, the Holy Spirit. “Laugh and pray,” said our family’s educational therapist to me once, and it’s something I remind myself of often.